mentally pooped

So yesterday was a very mentally taxing day for me. In not one, but two forums on this blasted computer, I found myself defending Christianity, and why I'm not a crazy person for believing that I am saved by grace and not by works, why I believe Christ is even the savior, and why not all Christians are far right wing kooks who want to blow up anyone on the left wing.
One set of people intended to let it be known that they were wiccan, and that Christians were afraid of talking about it, and that we were close minded and had no interest in learning about others. I could not be silent. I am always interested in learning about other people's beliefs, the why, the how, the what made them believe that way. What I am not interested in is being lumped in with other people who call themselves Christian, yet cannot see past the belief to see the person beneath.
In the other discussion, I was called brain washed and told that "other than brainwashing, and your 'inner' feeling, you have nothing.. absolutely nothing." along with other accusations launched at the Christianity belief system as a whole. To which I responded in a big long thing that was pretty defensive.
I have enough to deal with in real life that causes me to have to be defensive and proactive, I really don't go looking for it in my online relationships. But sometimes, I just cannot sit here and let the entire Christian population be lumped into one inflexible, close minded, non-Christian hating lump.
And so, at the end of the second discussion, and the end of my mentally taxing day, I found myself apologizing for defending my beliefs, for defending my Lord. I then logged off, turned my computer off and went to bed.
I pray every night as I'm laying in bed, and last night, my prayer was an "I'm sorry" to the Lord. I felt Him speaking to me that I should never apologize for defending my Lord, for defending my belief in Him, and that if I'm truly living for Him, that is the best witness I can be-trying to change some myths about believers as a whole.
So today, I'm abstaining from all things non-fluffy in nature. In my spare time that I spend on this computer today, I vow to not get into any more deep of a discussion than "What's for dinner?" Sometimes, deep discussions are good, and then, there are some days when it's all I can do to deal with the tangible dramas in my life. That's why I spend my time online searching for calming things like quotes from our ancestors, and cool photography and art, and poetry. Those things make my ever moving mind calm down for a few minutes.
And so... off to the ever unfolding drama of my children.